Thursday, January 4, 2018

Being A Mom

I am going to start 2018 with a blog on what the lives of many moms are like.  A mom is supposed to be smart. Wise. Know it all. She is supposed to have all the answers to all the questions raised in front of her. Have the solutions to all the problems. Must not have a hair out of place. Not lose their cool. Behave like they have ten heads, twenty pairs of hands and the speed of Flash to go around sorting things out.

Well, to be honest, I have always wanted children. The idea of having a family means having children yes? And when you are growing up and you read all these fairy tale books about happily ever after. I am not going to talk about finding the love of your life, getting married and all. I am talking about what happens after that. You have children together, raise wonderful young adults and continue to live happily ever after.

So I assumed kids were very important for this happily ever after. And I do not regret it one bit. My children are a big part of who I am today and most moves I make in life are made keeping them in mind. I say most, not all. There is a part of me that needs to live for me. That wants to do stuff making sure that I give myself that space. This space is vital for me and them.

For me, it is to clear my head. There is so much clutter that this precious little me-time gives me a break and I can make fairly sane decisions. So that I do not jump to conclusions too often. I make unbiased decisions and I am mostly in a good mood.

If I am in a good mood, the kids are happy. Hence the mommy-needs-her-alone-time works marvellously for them as well.

So, while being a mom is not easy, it can be made easier. I have learnt in time that it is alright to be a little selfish. To do what I love. To make the kids watch some television so that I can read a book or catch up with an old friend on the phone. To make them play on their own so that I can do something on my own.

While some may gasp wondering how I could let the kids watch TV so that I concentrate on my life, there are a few would understand this mentality. Sometimes it is really alright to not have to devote all your time for the kids. I mean, don’t you think that the kids would also want some time on their own? Would they not appreciate some quality time doing something ‘non-productive’?

Being a mom is not about being perfect. It is about being able to let go. To be normal. To just be.


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