Thursday, April 28, 2016


As per you, what are the inputs for maintaining and nurturing a happy relationship?

Happy relationship. People who have not had the luck of being in one will call it an oxymoron. It is very much real. It does very much exist. Most people can have it. Nothing comes easy in life does it? If you want a promotion at work, you take on extra load. If you want strong muscles, you lift extra weight. The same theory applies to relationships as well. If you want a happy and satisfying relationship, you will have to work on it. You will have to put in your share. On the not-so-good days, you will have to put in more than your share to make it work. It is always worth it.
What do you need to put in to make the relationship a good one? There should be a genuine bond. A real connection. While dating is good and fun, a relationship is taking things to the next level.  A good relationship needs to be nurtured like a plant.
Companionship – it is the most undervalued yet highly important factor that differentiates between a good relationship and a nurturing one. Yes, the sex can be good and yes you can have good times. The key to a real relationship is when the people involved are truly companions to each other, and not just someone to while away time with.  When there is good companionship and trust, the sex is naturally good.
Time –Spending time with each other is the best way to show your appreciation. Buying a bling or a gadget to make the other person happy always works, but it is a very temporary emotion. While happiness is a state of mind, satisfaction is where you want to be. The feeling of contentment can arise with the meeting of the minds, which can happen only when time, not money is spent. The answer is in honest and open communication. “The strongest of all warriors are these two – time and patience”.
Vulnerability – it is ok to be vulnerable to the other person. Displaying your weakness is a very good thing. You are not afraid of showing the other person who you are and what you are thinking. Talking to each other and opening your hearts out is a sure fire way of making things click. Knowing that the other person is always going to be there for you, no matter what, is something every good relationship has.
Trust – when you are vulnerable with the other person, you are telling them that you trust them. You are handing over your remote to them. They know all your buttons but you trust them not to push them. Trust in a relationship opens up to a whole new world of pleasure.
Love – “All you need is love”, said John Lenon. When there is love in a relationship, there is always an inclination to make things work out.  When you like someone, you are expressing what you feel. When you love someone, it is about them. When you love someone, you want what’s best for them. You will always tend to put the other person before you. Wanting to see them happy will be the motivation. This formula can almost never go wrong. This is because they are safe in your hands. They know it too.
Laughter – There is a beautiful quote “They told me that to make her fall in love, I had to make her laugh. But every time she laughs, I’m the one who falls in love”. You might not be able to fall in love with someone who does not make you laugh. Laughter is most definitely the best medicine. Both the physical body and the mind feel better. The endorphins that are released when you laugh from the bottom of your heart make you feel good about yourself. Fun and laughter go hand in hand.
From initial attraction to a long term deep relationship, laughter is always an essential ingredient. In a serious situation, it will diffuse the tension. Sharing a good laugh with your better half is very likely to improve your relationship with them.
A smile – a smile can really go a long way. While a good joke can make you laugh, small gestures can make you smile. Sharing happy moments together do strengthen a bond. It helps you beat the bad times. The good times are worth everything else that the universe can throw at you.
Gestures – End of the day, it is the little things that matter. Smile at your significant other. Greet them with a hug. Open the door for them. Breakfast in bed goes a long way. Going for a small walk in the evening, holding hands is good therapy. Be nice. Chivalry isn’t dead.
Make-up – Fighting isn’t the end of the world. All couples fight. It is the willingness to come together and make it work is what will make the relationship last. Making up can be fun too, besides.
The first thing everyone talks about is being in love with the other person. But when the other person is your best friend, there is nothing better than that, is there.  You can always be yourself with your best friend. When you fall in love with your best friend, or when the one you love becomes your best friend, you are looking at your soul mate.

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